Monday, March 26, 2012

Damon's Nose

R.A.D. Stainforth...and his hero...



Damon's Nose



I'm too vain to cry much;
my sniffs hide mute
 
behind strands of my hair,
and layers of waterproof mascara.

With a random hanky-snort,
mine foghorns out a cute G,

not all loud and garble-monster,
like a prehistoric disposer.

I wonder what Matt Damon's
sounds like, leghorn-straight,

squared off at the end
like Bob Hope's.



tk/March 2012


image: Duane Michals
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56 comments:

  1. AnonymousSun Mar 25, 08:40:00 AM

    Great photo, Tess, and funny (poignant) poem. I especially like the garble-monster--

    AT the risk of uninvited self-promotion, I have written and recently published a whole comic novel on a similar subject. It is called NOSE DIVE, and it is a lot of fun--in this case the girl's not so involved with Matt Damon and Bob Hope as with various female songstresses--B. Streisand, Julie Andrews, Lady G. Here's the link (I hope)
    Nose Dive

    It is a fun topic. k.

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  2. Tess KincaidSun Mar 25, 08:51:00 AM

    Thanks for the link K...sounds like a very witty and entertaining book!

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  3. Alan BurnettSun Mar 25, 08:52:00 AM

    Tess, this is writing of a very high quality indeed. You really are one of the very best Blogging poets currently in business (and I am not just saying that because you are my honorary little sister)

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  4. Cro MagnonSun Mar 25, 09:05:00 AM

    How many poems can there be, dedicated to the art of nose-blowing; not too many I guess. Well done Tess; another winner!

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  5. kaykualaSun Mar 25, 09:51:00 AM

    Sniffs are better than snorts! Nose blowing can be distracting in public. Would rather frequent the Rest Rooms.
    Good picture choice,Tess! And a fun verse!

    Hank

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  6. Laurel's QuillSun Mar 25, 10:13:00 AM

    Does anybody really like their nose??? She does kinda look like she's contemplating going under the knife! Love the poem.

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  7. sukipoetSun Mar 25, 10:18:00 AM

    the humor is delightful.

    i never thought of someone who doesnt cry often doing it out of vanity.


    i rarely cry, but i want to. only movies bring it out.

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  8. MargaretSun Mar 25, 10:43:00 AM

    Very, very entertaining. My oldest daughter has allergies and we "CRINGE" when she "blows". Fun reading... love his voice. (Kept waiting for his cigarette butt to drop off :)

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  9. Kathe W.Sun Mar 25, 10:56:00 AM

    hilarious- snort!

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  10. Tess KincaidSun Mar 25, 11:11:00 AM

    Margaret I love how R.A.D. begins and ends staring at Damon's picture...too funny!

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  11. LolamouseSun Mar 25, 11:26:00 AM

    You raise the commonplace to the profound with this one! Love it!

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  12. MartinSun Mar 25, 12:25:00 PM

    "...mine foghorns out a cute G..." One of your best lines, Tess.

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  13. MaggieSun Mar 25, 12:48:00 PM

    This is awesome! What a wonderful post. : )

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  14. DaydreamertooSun Mar 25, 01:18:00 PM

    The genteel art of blowing ones nose. Who would have thought it could be turned into poetry and... so well too!
    Fabulous :)

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  15. ScarletSun Mar 25, 01:53:00 PM

    RAD reads your poetry very well.

    Who knew we can write about Damon's nose ~

    Thanks for the prompt ~

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  16. UnknownSun Mar 25, 03:08:00 PM

    So funny...I'm watching the Bourne Identity as I'm reading this! Worlds are colliding!

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  17. AnonymousSun Mar 25, 03:44:00 PM

    Loved the tone of this poem.
    A sweet beat to her.

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  18. Little NellSun Mar 25, 03:54:00 PM

    Tess, this is so funny and witty. I'll never see Matt Damon in quite the same way again. Am I the only one who thinks RAD sounds like the gorgeous Bill Nighy?

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  19. Kat MortensenSun Mar 25, 04:16:00 PM

    Nice little fun one, Tess. I like the "hanky-snort" and the reference to Hope.

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  20. S.E.IngrahamSun Mar 25, 05:41:00 PM

    snort, honk - as others have said - it will be hard to look at Matt Damon quite the same from now on ... I've always maintained tho', his nose is what keeps him from being totally handsome - cute yes, a hunk? not entirely ... fun poem ... great pic

    http://aleapingelephant.blogspot.ca/2012/03/mirror-mirror.html

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  21. WanderSun Mar 25, 06:33:00 PM

    Thanks for the prompt Tess...and your poem, the schnoz is a sacred subject and you held it sacrosanct...

    Wander

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  22. Laurie KolpSun Mar 25, 07:03:00 PM

    I like the flashback... an exquisite piece, Tess.

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  23. ChevrefeuilleSun Mar 25, 08:13:00 PM

    Nice poem with a smile. Very well done this take on the photo.

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  24. Maude LynnSun Mar 25, 09:33:00 PM

    This is just incredibly clever!

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  25. Other MarySun Mar 25, 10:02:00 PM

    lol, very clever. Personally I am an ugly crier, and a very loud sneezer.

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  26. Wayne PitchkoSun Mar 25, 10:35:00 PM

    "bless you"...Tess....as I smile at my great nose...nicely done

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  27. AnonymousSun Mar 25, 10:51:00 PM

    like walking around with your own trumpet

    mirrored

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  28. ✿Mon Mar 26, 03:02:00 AM

    This is just about the best line of poetry ever: "With a random hanky-snort"

    rosemarymint.wordpress.com

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  29. relMon Mar 26, 05:00:00 AM

    Mine used to be, what I saw as large, but has shrunk as my ears have grown.
    rel

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  30. Silent Otto Mon Mar 26, 06:08:00 AM

    Amazing how the excess spray made those human like faces on the glass!

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  31. izzyMon Mar 26, 08:21:00 AM

    I have known a few fog horns in my time! thanks!

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  32. HelenMon Mar 26, 09:30:00 AM

    You and R.A.D. make quite the pair! His readings of your wonderful poetry are a match made in heaven!

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  33. annell4Mon Mar 26, 11:21:00 AM

    I love Duane Michals image and all his images. Nice selection. I have missed you, but my words have been 'missing' haven't been able to string two together to save my soul. Giving it a try again.... the words seem to be reentering the room where I am, slowly, with caution.

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  34. Leslie Jane MoranMon Mar 26, 11:52:00 AM

    Somehow, I'm thinking that even "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" would sound mellifluous if R.A.D. read it!:)

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  35. robkistnerMon Mar 26, 12:38:00 PM

    this was fun Tess - very cool...! Mine sounds like a Husqvarna chain saw, in need of tightening and lacking proper lubrication... :)

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  36. GailOMon Mar 26, 12:50:00 PM

    What a hoot! Love it!

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  37. HelenaMon Mar 26, 04:25:00 PM

    Ah-titilating-choo! Fun read. I have my nose chopped in a second had I the money...!!

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  38. Stafford RayMon Mar 26, 04:26:00 PM

    Interesting take Tess, sounds of snorts shaped by the schnoz!
    So yours is a G. All you need now is two others with a D and a B to make beautiful music together!

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  39. chiccorealMon Mar 26, 05:02:00 PM

    Dear Tess: Hahah~ funny..noises off~talk about a brass band~! Creative~! Ronaldo is primo~

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  40. Tumblewords:Mon Mar 26, 05:56:00 PM

    Great fun. A nose blowing experience? Matt Damon? I always wanted to fix his nose, but...maybe I should be more appreciative. :)

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  41. A Walk In My HeartMon Mar 26, 08:22:00 PM

    Delightful sense of humor. Love the reading by RAD.

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  42. AnonymousMon Mar 26, 10:19:00 PM

    Tess Kincaid's poetry is fun to read ... I always blow my nose first ...

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  43. Tess KincaidMon Mar 26, 10:55:00 PM

    What note does your nose blow, R.A.D.? Thank you for another lovely delivery of my words...

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  44. hyperCRYPTICalTue Mar 27, 04:11:00 AM

    Love the humour!

    Anna :o]

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  45. moondustwriterTue Mar 27, 08:15:00 AM

    Even Matt has to blow that nose doesnt he?
    I like where your reflection takes the reader Tess
    hope all is well

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  46. Carrie Van HornTue Mar 27, 09:37:00 AM

    Nose blowing is almost a fine art....especially when you have extreme alergies like me.....love this Tess!!

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  47. AnonymousTue Mar 27, 11:53:00 AM

    With a really good blow mine is A flat Tess ... just a semitone higher than yours ... quite discordant if we blew together ...

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  48. philTue Mar 27, 07:08:00 PM

    A cute G. Then no need for a tuning fork.
    And everyone starts humming. Ha!

    Wonderful, tk!

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  49. signed...bkmTue Mar 27, 08:56:00 PM

    the art of nose blowing...a Cute G...the gift of a celebrity nostrils...bkm

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  50. AnonymousTue Mar 27, 09:15:00 PM

    Not quite right in the head darling ...

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  51. Tess KincaidTue Mar 27, 09:23:00 PM

    You're just now noticing?

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  52. NehaTue Mar 27, 09:50:00 PM

    that was very hilarious. Enjoyed reading it :) :)

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  53. Dave KingWed Mar 28, 04:16:00 AM

    Superb - and I am a connoisseur of the art of nose blowing!

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  54. LydiaFri Mar 30, 05:01:00 AM

    So fantastic! Your bringing Bob Hope into the poem was such a surprise.

    R.A.D., with his cigarette, in his b&w world, is super.

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  55. AnonymousFri Mar 30, 02:24:00 PM

    yowsa - another gem from the pen of the Tess

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  56. Tess KincaidFri Mar 30, 07:04:00 PM

    A heartfelt thank you, dear readers. I so appreciate all your kind comments every week. You make it very easy to share my stuff.

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Inject a few raisins of conversation into the tasteless dough of existence.
― O. Henry (and me)

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