Tuesday, December 31, 2013

I hate New Year's resolutions ... here's mine ...

I never make New Year's resolutions; but this year I am making an exception. My dearest friend told me of a dream. Dreams that include me make me feel uneasy, as if a look-alike captured on surveillance camera is doing something beyond my control.

This particular dream was of a post I had written about my childhood in rural Indiana. It felt compellingly right. I am inspired. (I don't inspire easily.) So, watch this space for a weekly nostalgic selfie; simple snapshots the Midwest, hopefully presented with a bit of quirk and intrigue.

My Christmas tree is still standing at Willow Manor. It stays up later every year. Ground Hog's Day is the usual expiration date, but Easter is not unreasonable. My paternal grandmother, Alice, was known to keep her tree up well into April. If one family member could not make it home for the holidays, she insisted on it standing firmly in the living room window until they made it home. Even if it meant spring break.

Trees in the 1950s were on the sparse side, anyway, as far as branches were concerned. They looked even more skeletal post-needles, colored lights wound around naked branches, limp ten-year-old tinsel, aged to a matte lead-gray. Even in mid-March, the lights on Alice's tree were religiously plugged into the wall socket at dusk. When her back was turned, my teenage Aunt Dee would draw the curtains, embarrassed what the neighbors in Burlington, Indiana might think of the icky ghost tree.

Grandma only knew me as a shy, precocious little girl. I think she would appreciate my grown-up passion, occasional strength, my small blatant tree, watered well into spring. As someone mentioned last week, it looks more like a Christmas bouquet, than a tree; a bouquet celebrating the new year, love, a hopeful me. She would like that I hang her faded-pink bell ornament near the top.


*Photo not me, but a close representation

Sunday, December 29, 2013

Selfie

self-portrait, Francis Bacon 

You step into the room, see yourself
look up from somewhere distant.

Your eyes reflect a safe interior,
without the anxiety of an unwanted stare.

Windows open to new air.

You stand unadorned
apart from the self-scorn
you wear around your neck.

Here is a place with no mirrors, no squinting,
thrust against the space between you.

Stretch out your arm, capture a forever moment
of the skin genuine, sweat-soaked and intimate. 



tk/December 2013 



Last month the word "selfie" was announced by the Oxford English Dictionary as "word of the year".

R.A.D. Stainforth's lovely bewhiskered read: 


Sunday, December 22, 2013

Minestrone

Madonna With the Milk Soup, 1510, Gerard David

The orchestration that captures me
is composed on album covers,

scribbled at night in the margins of cookbooks,
moonless on junk mail.

Steamy bowls wait in the windowsill
until morning, when they have cooled

enough to be spooned and sipped,
the tang that comes with my heightening.

The ladle is filled to overflowing;
take care with rustling, everything might spill.

You have something of mine, maestro
the close rhythm of this sigh.



tk/December 2013


A delicious read by R.A.D. Stainforth...



Sunday, December 15, 2013

Yellow House

The Ice Cutters, 1911, Natalia Goncharova
I lie with insomnia,
wishing it was you.
Listen as salt trucks echo
along the river road;
dare to disturb monochrome.

The autumn of me craves
orange marmalade on toast,
breakfast with no conversation,
watching sunflowers
grow into firm-fleshed love children.

I think about Vincent nibbling his paint,
how the taste of his favorite
floated vivid on his tongue,
how he was happiest
in the yellow house.



tk/December 2013


The excellent R.A.D. Stainforth contemplating a yellow house...I hear a cat...



Sunday, December 8, 2013

Transatlantic

Whole sardines line the horizon,
shimmer like eyes after a hard cry.

I smear a silver bite on bread;
think miracles, loaves and fishes,
mouthfuls of ocean,
heaving waves, ways of knowing
the hands of a fishmonger,
a dash of Viking.

The tapestry is nearly done;
I complete it with a sailor's knot,
float it across the water,
add my name to the passenger list,
become next of kin,
drink a toast to St. Elmo's fire.

I let it steal my tongue;
swallow, and still find the taste of it. 


tk/December 2013


Sexy read by the dashing, bewhiskered R.A.D. Stainforth...is it my imagination...or is the boat rocking? 


Sunday, December 1, 2013

Vorfreude

Divine darkness comes
as you leave to find sleep,
black wings cover me.

What did moths bump into
before there were light bulbs?

How did I exist before your eyes?

Flutter morning awake;
frighten me just a little
with your estuary,
the sound of oars
drawing me from the shore,
church bells in the distance.

Take me out far enough
to feel the wind in my hair.

Give me an excuse to hide,
tuck some hallelujah,
let it burn a hole in my pocket.

I dare not sin against hope.



tk/November 2013

Vorfreude (n.)  The joyful, intense anticipation that comes from imagining future pleasures


I could listen to R.A.D. Stainforth say "church bells" all day...